Man unaware of 5-inch tree branch in eye socket for 1.5 years

Doctors in Omsk, Russia, recently performed what they described as a 'routine removal of arboreal material from cranial cavity' on Gennady 'Gena' Petrov, after he presented with what he called 'a persistent, splintery feeling, like looking at the world through a picket fence, but only on weekends.' Petrov, 47, a lumberjack by trade and hobby, had been living with a 4.7-inch pine branch embedded deep within his eye socket for a reported 18 months, completely oblivious to its presence. "Honestly, I just thought my vision insurance was getting worse," Petrov reportedly told medical staff, adding that he'd been compensating by 'tilting his head a lot, like a confused owl' and attributing his newfound difficulty with depth perception to 'the general shifty nature of reality these days.' His wife, Svetlana, noted that she'd repeatedly asked him why he always wore an eyepatch with a twig poking out, to which he'd always replied, 'Fashion, Svetlana, you wouldn’t understand.' Medical professionals are now debating whether Petrov’s case represents a new frontier in human resilience or a concerning decline in self-awareness, particularly concerning the presence of medium-sized plant matter inside one’s facial orifices. Petrov, for his part, is reportedly recovering well and is looking forward to finally seeing 'what all the fuss is about' with 3D movies.