Donald Trump Buffalo Is Eid Sensation

DHAKA, BANGLADESH – A 26-maund (1,040 kg) buffalo, recently christened 'Donald Trump' due to a perceived likeness, has captivated millions leading up to Eid al-Adha. Experts, initially baffled by the public's fervor, have now concluded the creature is, in fact, a bovine. Despite its immense size and a surprisingly stoic, almost defiant gaze, agricultural scientists confirm ‘Donald Trump’ exhibits no known policy positions, nor has it, to date, attempted to overturn any election results. Local farmers, capitalizing on the buzz, have priced the animal at an astronomical 1.5 million takas (approximately $12,700 USD). Buyers, undeterred, have reportedly cited the buffalo's 'tremendous' horns and 'very, very strong' hooves as justification for the premium. One potential purchaser, speaking anonymously, stated, 'You see that beef? That’s grade-A beef. The best beef. Everyone agrees.' Critics, however, suggest the entire phenomenon is a reflection of collective delusion, pointing out that the buffalo is neither orange, nor does it possess a comb-over. Further analysis confirmed it communicates exclusively through mooing, showing little interest in social media or late-night cable news programs.